Saturday, March 14, 2009

"...but you don't even have kids!"

This phrase was recently said to me not once, but twice. Twice negating the value of my time.


When do you wake up in the morning? I wake up around 6:45, allowing me time to eat breakfast, check my email (and by email I mean facebook) and get pretty for the day. 6:45, which was fifteen minutes after the suggested meet time. I don't think so. It was assumed I'd be up for the early morning task, which was met with a big fat "Heck no!" from me.


"But you don't even have kids"


That's right. I also don't have influenza, rickets, a mold infestation or a host of other things that might make it difficult for me to get up and out of the house at such an ungodly hour. I don't have kids, but what does that have to do with anything? If I have children I have a legitimate reason to wake up at 5:30 in the AM, but if I don't have kids I don't have a legitimate reason to not get up at 5:30 in the AM.... As I struggled to wrap my brain around what this meant I couldn't reach any sort of logical conclusion. I can only guess it is because people who have children feel very validated by their ability to reproduce. A validation that supercedes anything I might have going on in my life.

So I've decided I need to fabricate some reasons for the future as to why I will not be able to meet my coworkers 2 hours before the work day begins...

... because my religion forbids me to drive before sunrise...
... because my inner city outreach program requires me to hand out coffee until 7:45...
... because I'll be too busy punching you and your kids in the face...
... because I'm memorizing New Moon word for word, which constitutes at least an hour of heavy reading every morning...
... because my dog ate my homework...
... and your kid...
... and just because it's called a "quick getaway" doesn't mean it doesn't take time to plan...

If you've experienced any sort of discrimination due to the fact that you are not a mother or father feel free to use any or all of these excuses against your critics. After all, the best use of your time is what you decide, and that should be apparent to us all.

3 comments:

Laura said...

I frequently tell people that I don't believe in 5am . . . on either end of being awake.

Anonymous said...

Way to go, Sarah. Years ago, the dean of the college where I taught decided that we would have faculty meetings at 7 a.m.

When I protested, one of the other, much older faculty members chided me with "What's the problem? What else do you have to do at 7 a.m.?"

I answered, "Sleep--eat breakfast--shower--get dressed--" etc. They didn't think it was funny, but neither did I. The dean was angry because faculty was not attending faculty meetings at the regular hour of 12 noon, or whenever they were, and so instead of lowering the hammer on those who skipped the meetings, he came up with the hair-brained idea of having meetings at 7 a.m. "so no one will have any excuse not to attend."

Right, I said, except for sleeping, eating breakfast, etc. . . .

I can't remember if the 7 a.m. meetings were ever actually held, but I do remember--very proudly--how much I protested against them.

Likewise, Sarah, I'm proud of you for protesting against your 6.30 a.m. meeting.

Eric said...

I hate meetings and will do almost anything to avoid them...to include career changes. When someone asks me to volunteer I always ask if there are meetings, if so, "How 'bout I just write you a check?"
Probably the only thing worse than meetings (ok, there are a ton of things worse, nasal surgery comes to mind) are parents who are sanctimonious shits because they've managed to do what mankind has been doing far too often for thousands of years, reproduce.
It's ok folks, we're at the top of the food chain, we can slow down now.


Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss